40 Reflections at 40
The very nearly full Moon in Leo over the waters of the south Pacific on my 40th.
Today I turn 40 – an age that feels huge in many ways. I’ve been reflecting at this ‘midlife juncture’ on who I am, what I want, the meaning of life, and what it means to live a full life. Especially at a decade marker and one like 40, aging and what it means to life a life and gain more years are at the forefront of my mind. Also, at the forefront of my mind are what getting older represents outside of more years, more time: more wisdom, more experiences, having longer (and hopefully deeper) relationships with people in your life, and meeting more, new people.
I’ve had a dream to send personal messages – postcards – to 40 people in my life, but that project will likely happen later in my 40th year. For now, I wanted to memorialize something at this juncture, so have accumulated 40 reflections on this 40th birthday. Some are personal to me; others are more observations that I find more common across the human experience. They are of course all opinions, not fact from one human trying her best to live a full life, being a loving and compassionate person to all.
looking at the South Pacific on the big day
1. Learning and growing is a constant desire; sometimes it’s linear and other times it is more circular.
2. Healing is a process – starting first with a deep look within.
3. Letting go provides peace because we are not in control of much, save for our own actions and reactions.
4. We each get to define what a life well lived means to us.
5. Abundance is not purely material but also emotional, spiritual, and about connection with others and the natural world.
6. None of us is perfect. We are all students of life.
7. Being authentic is critical to feeling at peace and at home.
8. Home is everywhere and anywhere.
9. Home is within me.
10. Happiness and joy are not fleeting states of being but accessible within at all times.
Polynesian birthday wishes
11. Life will life – ups and downs; the 10K joys and 10K sorrows. No life is purely smooth.
12. How we approach life’s sunny days and stormy days will greatly inform our experience of life.
13. There is so much I don’t know - humility is key.
14. There is much I do know – self-confidence is critical to moving through the world with my head held high.
15. We are each unique and share so much in common.
16. Tapping into joy and fun on a regular basis reinvigorates me.
17. Allow the waves of emotions and thoughts to be – they are like the weather – they will pass; nothing is forever.
18. Change is constant. How can I adapt?
19. Gratitude and appreciation for the people and goodness in my life are important as a regular practice to ground and anchor myself in the present moment and truth.
20. Staying present when possible is what I want to strive for, rather than being so wrapped up in the future or past.
the beautiful and tasty surprise from my husband and the kitchen, complete with Taha’a vanilla - a local specialty
21. I am made up of my own experiences, the influence of the people I meet, things I learn, and my family history.
22. There is so much to see and experience in this world, and I want to see and experience as much as possible of the world.
23. Travel makes me feel alive, like movement and yoga.
24. I want to keep learning new things and being curious.
25. Ask questions to understand and listen deeply to others.
26. Let love lead – in interpersonal and intrapersonal matters. Love of others, love of the world, and love of self are all important.
27. Love, peace, compassion, forgiveness, equanimity all start within then can ripple outwards.
28. Experiences – good, bad, and neutral – are all a part of life. What lessons can I learn? How can I show up in each of these?
29. We each have a light inside, a life force that burns brightly. I want my light to shine.
30. Nature teaches us so much – how everything has a place; nothing is taken for granted.
31. We are nature.
32. Connection over separation.
33. No one is an island. We need each other and can mutually benefit from our connections.
34. Aging is a gift – this human experience is short in the span of time.
35. How I feel inside is reflected in how I feel outside.
36. It’s okay not to be okay. Acknowledge feelings (see the temporary nature).
37. Investigate my why to understand where I come from and where I’m going, as well as why I do and say what I do and say.
38. I believe in the human rights of all people and their autonomy and freedoms.
39. I value love, care, empathy, curiosity, open-mindedness, truth, loyalty, friendship above much else.
40. Life is meant to be lived – be awake for this one wild and precious life.
First dinner at 40!
